Keys in life

Not Caring if People Don’t Like me Doesn’t Make me a Bad Person; Changing so They Will Does

Finding inspiration for this week’s post was a bit difficult. I admit that when I first started this blogging thing I had fears of running out of things to write about. Each time I post something I hope it is found interesting and well written. But, what I desire most is for someone to be encouraged and inspired because of something I shared. Not in a narcissistic or superficial way – but, genuine and life changing. It is my hope to stimulate thought and drive people to authentically be themselves. But what does that mean?

When I was about 9 years-old I learned how much rejection can hurt. I remember the incident vividly. It was a Friday night and I was at church with my mother and brother. Service had ended and we were lined up to greet the Pastor, which was our custom. There were two girls, the same age as me, standing behind me laughing and talking. I remember saying, “You must be talking about something really funny.” They both replied, “Yes.” I quickly turned to them and one of them was pointing at me and mouthed, “You.” That was not what I expected to see. Prior to that encounter, I had no idea they didn’t like me.

I kept my composure until I was in the car with my family. I burst into tears and I told my mother all about it. I couldn’t understand how I could be disliked by simply being myself. In my mind I had done nothing wrong to warrant their ridicule. But, I walked away with an invaluable lesson; being who you are may create haters, but that does not mean you should change. This is another reason why I push for self-acceptance.

People will dislike you for the most ridiculous reasons, which in most cases it stems from their insecurities. But, I want to encourage you to be who you are in spite of their shortcomings.

Being you means allowing your personality to be seen when others express disapproval. I’ll be honest, when I see people look me up and down with disgust only makes me throw these hips harder.

I am determined to be authentic in every area of my life with the understanding that I may not be liked. The 9 year-old Towanda was wise enough to recognize the idiocy of changing to be liked – so why would I change now?

From the very beginning of my quest in 2015 I have implored you to be yourselves unapologetically, and that message has not changed. Can my ability to form sentences to frame around one thought really ignite this cause? I certainly hope so.

Until the next time, be you and most importantly- love you.

Being uniquely you is being uniquely beautiful.

– B.B.