Liberty & the Pursuit of Happiness

What Does it Mean to be Unapologetically Me? Moving Past Doubt

Last Saturday, I had the privilege of participating in the “I am Enough Girl’s Talk Women’s Conference: Build Me, Don’t Break Me,” which was absolutely wonderful from start to finish. I was invited to be a participant on a panel discussion surrounding the impact of social media on our “enoughness.” I was accompanied by four phenomenal women on the panel, Pastor Latoya Benson, Jaclyn Small, Qwishuna Smith, and Tonoah Hampton.

Before the discussion began our moderator, LaKesha Bailey James, shared our bios with the attendees. In all honesty after hearing the successes of my fellow panel members, I questioned my presence on the stage. I thought, ‘I haven’t done half of what these ladies have; why am I here?’

From left to right, LaKesha Bailey James, Pastor Latoya Benson, Jaclyn Small, Qwishuna Smith, Tonoah Hampton, and me. (Dress from eShakti.com, shoes by Michael Antonio)

During the panel conversation the moderator asked me what being unapologetically me-a hashtag I use often- means. In the past I spent a lot of time apologizing for a lot of things. Mainly for stuff I did naturally. At the time I didn’t realize I was allowing negativity to influence me to view the things that make up who I am as a mistake.

The word apologize means to express regret for something that one has done wrong. I was being myself; so, why was I apologizing? Over time I began to realize the error was my failure to allow my true identity to shine through regardless of what others thought. Being unapologetic means to behave in a manner that does not acknowledge or express regret. Now I view being Towanda requires being unapologetic.

Throwback green skirt and flowered blouse from Eloquii

While I was on that stage last week I was the negative force in my head fighting against myself. As I am writing this, I see the need to apologize to myself for doubting my “enoughness.” Towanda, I apologize for doubting your worth and ability to add substance to every situation you encounter. We all have a story to tell and we each have a different way of expressing it-and that includes me.

Learning to love and and accept self is a daily job. Some days it is easy and others take some effort. I am determined to love and accept myself each day regardless of the level of effort it may require. I am grateful for the opportunity I had last week at the “I Am Enough” Campaign Conference. It was a great fellowship empowering women to recognize and embrace the fact that we are enough. I left with more tools to fight self-doubt and non-acceptance. I appreciate being reminded I am enough.

Until the next time be you, and most importantly-love you.

Being uniquely you is being uniquely beautiful.

-B.B. đź’‹

Thoughts?

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